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SUMMARY: Two boys growing up together in an idyllic beachfront community share a passion for baseball. One excels at the game and plays it with reckless abandon; the other, less talented, studies the game and those who play it, hoping someday to share what he learns with others. Best friends since childhood, the two have seen how baseball can bring them closer together. Now, having just graduated from high school, it’s about to show them a crueler side of the game. Baseball is about to separate them even though neither wants that to happen. You can find a longer synopsis of the entire story here. Please note that italics are typically used to indicate what a character is thinking or saying to himself.
WARNING: This story is a work of adult fiction and intended for mature audiences only. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Unless otherwise indicated by context, all of the characters, leagues, stadiums, teams and clubs portrayed or mentioned in this story are fictional, not depictions of real people, leagues, stadiums, teams and clubs. Please note that the story may describe, depict or otherwise include graphic portrayals of relationships between men and/or adolescent boys that are homosexual in nature. If you do not like or approve of such discussions or it is illegal for you to read such material, consider yourself warned. If you continue to read this story, you are asserting that you are fully capable of understanding and legally consenting to reading a work of adult fiction.
NOTICE: This story is my property and protected by the copyright laws of the United States and other countries. It may not be reproduced in any form without my written permission. You may download a single copy to read offline and to share with others as long as you credit me as the author. However, you may not use this work for commercial purposes or to profit from it in any way. You may not use any of the characters, leagues, stadiums, teams, clubs, or other fictional locations described in the story in your own work without my explicit permission. Nor may you use, alter, transform, or build upon the story in any way. If you share this story with others, you must make clear the terms under which it is licensed to them. The best way to do that is by linking to this web page.
NOTES: Please check these notes every week. If there is something I want to alert you to as I post each chapter, this is where I will I do so.
“So what’s the question,” I asked.
“Are you gay, Hunter?”
Coming out of the blue like that, Cameron’s question caught me completely off-guard. I had thought he was going to ask something easy and could hardly believe he asked that of all things. Not sure how to respond, I did what I always did in situations like that. I tried to buy time for myself to come up with an answer.
“Um, jeez, now that’s an interesting question,” I replied. “What makes you ask something like that, Cameron?”
“The reason I ask is because I think you’re gay and have been trying to tell me that for a while now,” he said. “I could be wrong, of course, and I apologize if I am; and it’s not like you have to answer unless you want to. But I think you do want to tell someone and are just having trouble getting the words out.”
“It’s not that I don’t want to answer, Cameron,” I replied. “It’s just that no one’s ever asked me something like that before and I don’t really know what I did to make you think I was gay.”
“You’re stalling for time, Hunter,” he said. “Both of us know that; and, look, I’m sorry if I seem to be putting you on the spot. That’s not the reason I asked. I can go back to my room if you prefer.”
With that he stood up, looked at me, and then turned as if he was about to leave.
I remember thinking that would be the end of the whole thing and we would never discuss it again if he walked away.
Let him go, Hunter, a voice from within urged.
“No, you don’t have to do that,” I said. “This place is yours as much as it’s mine. You can stay.”
He turned around and just stood there staring at me for what seemed like forever without saying a word. The silence was suffocating and I remember looking away.
“It’s just that, um, it’s . . . um, you know, hard. You know what I mean?”
“I do, Hunter,” he responded, softly. “I know it’s hard.”
“And sometimes, you know, people get all bent out of shape about things like that,” I continued.
“I know that.”
“And what difference does it make after all?” I added. “You know? I mean, if I said I was gay, would it make any difference?”
“Would it make any difference?” he responded, repeating the question back to me. “That’s a tough one, Hunter. I think it would make all the difference in the world for you if you could say it to someone, but for me? The only difference it would make is I would admire you even more than I already do; and I admire you a lot.”
Why? I recall thinking.
Why do you admire me, Cameron?
What have I ever done to make anyone admire me?
I looked up at him for a moment and I could feel tears welling up in the back of my eyes.
Then I looked down again and stared at the floor.
I remember swallowing as I tried to get the words to come out.
“I, um, I mean, yeah, maybe; I guess maybe I’m kind of different that way,” I whispered.
“There’s a word for it, Hunter,” he said, placing a hand on my shoulder. “You’ll feel better if you say the word.”
Why are you doing this to me, Cameron?
What did I ever do to you?
“Okay, you wanna know; yeah,” I responded. “I’m gay. There; I said it. Does it make you happier that I said it?”
And then, without knowing why, I started crying like some little baby.
I don’t know why I was crying and I remember being embarrassed. It wasn’t like I was sad or angry; if anything, I was relieved in a way. I remember thinking I was glad it was over, that someone finally knew the truth other than me. It was like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders and the dull pain that had been there so long was suddenly gone. I didn’t have a clue why I was crying.
“Everything’s okay, Hunter,” Cameron whispered, helping me from the chair and embracing me. “There’s nothing wrong with being gay. You’ve known that for a long time inside your head, but it can be scary not having anyone to talk to about it. But now you do and I’m proud of you.”
We just stood there embracing like that for a long time without saying anything more. It felt so good, so perfect, everything about it seemed right; and then at some point, I could feel myself becoming aroused just from the touch of his hands on my body.
Oh, god, please don’t do this, Hunter, I said to myself. Don’t ruin everything like this.
But it was like I didn’t have control of my body any longer. It wasn’t listening to me anymore and it wanted to do things that had been denied much too long.
I leaned over and kissed him on his lips, softly. His body tensed and he hesitated momentarily, but didn’t pull away from me. I knew I should stop, I even tried, but I couldn’t; and then I could feel my hand exploring his body, gently. Finally it reached his belt buckle and came to a rest momentarily, as if trying to decide what to do.
Suddenly all of the hesitation it had shown up until then was gone and it started tugging at his belt, trying to get the thing open; slowly at first, then with a sense of urgency that hadn’t been present before.
I think it was only when the buckle yielded I realized what I was doing and stopped, abruptly.
“I’m sorry, Cameron. I shouldn’t be doing this. I apologize. It’s just that I . . .”
“Shush,” he said placing a finger against my lips and silencing them.
And now at last I realized he had already decided at some level. He could have stopped me at any point, but he had chosen not to and I remember being grateful for that.
I leaned over and kissed him again, only harder this time; and this time his body didn’t tense up. This time it allowed me to do what I wanted to do and I knew what I wanted to do.
I had been waiting all my life to do this with someone I cared about and who cared about me; and even though I realized at some level it was wrong, the feelings were too overpowering by now and I tried to block everything out of my mind except what I was feeling.
Within a few moments the two of us were naked. I was kissing him and exploring his body with my hands. He maneuvered me into his bedroom and on to his bed. We were on our knees now, facing one another. Our lips would cross the distance that separated them, eagerly embrace, and then linger for a few moments before separating again, permitting our eyes to soak in the beauty of the face staring back at us.
Just looking at his slim, lithe, body aroused me in a way I had never been aroused when I was alone with Mary Ellen or Nicole. I wanted him. I wanted him in a way I had never wanted anything so desperately before in my life.
He turned around, facing away from me for a moment, then scooted back until his shoulders and back were resting against my chest. His arms reached behind my neck and encouraged me to move forward closer to him, which I did. I began kissing the side of his face, nibbling his ears, then kissing his neck and his shoulders even as my fingers played with his nipples.
It was the most incredibly sensuous thing I had ever experienced in my life up until then; so intense, so powerful, so completely different from anything I had ever done before with anyone.
This is better, I said to myself. This is the way it should be. This is the way I want it to be, not just tonight but forever.
Eventually we were on our sides facing one another. The two of us just lay there like that for a long time, kissing from time to time and then retreating and just staring into each other’s eyes; and then later, much later, he roused himself and began kissing my body.
This was different from anything Mary Ellen and I had ever done and I remember closing my eyes and just letting him do it to me. He began at my forehead, detoured to my ears momentarily, and then systematically began working his way down my body.
There were times when I found myself moaning uncontrollably as his lips explored every inch of my body; and when the moaning became especially intense, he understood he had discovered some secret pleasure point I had never even been aware of up until then and allowed his tongue and his lips to linger while I thrashed around on the bed under their assault.
I was pounding my fists on the bed as he approached my groin. But after one quick lick and swirl of his head that left me gasping, he moved quickly down to my thighs and continued his steady progression down to my feet and toes. It was incredible feeling his tongue press between my toes, so sensual, so intense, so pleasurable.
By now I wasn’t just totally aroused; I had no control over my body. I was thrashing around on the bed, begging him not to stop; and then his lips, tongue and mouth were climbing my body again, approaching the place I wanted them to be more than anywhere else.
I had never considered thighs especially sensitive. But as he pressed his tongue into the crack that separated my thigh from my groin, I lost it completely. He could have done anything he wanted to me at that moment and I would have let him. But he knew what I wanted him to do and that’s what he did.
With Mary Ellen and Nicole, what he was doing now had somehow been mechanistic, almost unfeeling. But with Cameron this was so much better, so much more intense. It was too much. I moaned even louder and began pumping my hips back and forth until our bodies were working together as one.
And then at some point I realized what was about to happen.
“Oh, no, stop; stop Cameron,” I whimpered, knowing it was a lie.
I didn’t want him to stop, just wanted him to have the chance to do so if that’s what he wanted.
Cameron knew that as well and he didn’t stop; if anything, he worked even harder to coax it from me.
“Uh, ooh, YES,” I screamed, exploding into his mouth.
I was panting now, gasping uncontrollably, and I continued to pant as the explosions came rapidly, one after the other, until the throbbing finally came to an end.
I opened my eyes and looked up and he was smiling at me.
“Unbelievable,” I whispered. “That was so unbelievable; oh, god, thank you for doing that, Cameron.”
And with that I pulled him down on top of me and pressed my tongue into his mouth.
He had saved some of the precious liquid, just a little, and we shared it together and I remember liking it, not so much for the taste but for the experience of sharing it together like that with him.
“Thank you,” I finally whispered again. “Thank you for helping me, Cameron.”
He didn’t say anything, just smiled and rested his head against my chest. I thought that would be the end of it, but I was wrong. Soon enough I felt a twitch and I think Cameron must have seen it as well because the next thing I knew he was nursing it back to life with his lips.
Eventually, satisfied with the work he had done, he reached over and retrieved a condom from his nightstand, removed it quickly from the wrapper and began rolling it into place on me. It happened so quickly I remember being surprised.
“I don’t know, Cameron,” I said. “I mean, you’ve already done so much and I don’t want to do anything . . .”
“Shush,” he whispered again. “I want to do this for you, Hunter.”
He retrieved a tube from the nightstand and handed it to me. I recall Mary Ellen using the same thing a long time ago.
“Gently,” he whispered, rolling over on to his stomach, folding his arms and resting his head on them.
I positioned myself above him, opened the cap and squeezed some of the liquid on to my fingers. It felt a little different than I expected, cool but not exactly wet. Looking down, I remember gasping at what I saw. His buns seemed to rise incredibly high, but the whole thing seemed small, much too small for what I was about to attempt.
He’s done so much for you, Hunter; don’t hurt him, that’s the last thing in the world you want to do.
I pushed my hand slowly between the cheeks and quickly arrived at the destination I was looking for. I stopped immediately and rubbed the lubricant on slowly, gently. I replenished the supply on my fingers and hand and made a second approach. This time I allowed one finger to push into him. It slid in more easily than I had thought it would, but I was being careful to press forward only slowly.
I continued doing that for a while as gently as I could. He was totally relaxed and had said nothing up to this point.
“I’m almost ready,” he finally whispered. “Kiss me while you finish what you’re doing.”
I leaned down and kissed him and suddenly there was a passion there that seemed different somehow, that seemed to reflect some long suppressed hunger he was now anxious to have satisfied. Never having done any of this before, I remember thinking I would have been satisfied just continuing to kiss him. But then he surprised me.
Rolling over on to his back and from beneath me, he curled himself into a tight ball, his legs reaching above and behind his head until his feet came to a rest against the headboard, where he quickly moved them apart, spread-eagled. I was astonished to see how limber he was.
Seeing him like that was too much to resist. I quickly positioned myself above and behind him and tried to press forward between his cheeks, no longer able to restrain myself anymore. Without ever being consciously aware of it, I had wanted to do this to someone I cared about forever; and now, in my eagerness, I tried to press into him quickly. But the position he was in didn’t permit it and I came to an abrupt halt.
He was tight, incredibly tight, and the position itself was awkward and unyielding; but realizing how desperate I was to gain entry, he slowly began bringing his spread-eagled legs together again. There was an initial moment of intense pleasure as I felt the tip push into him slightly. But that experience was quickly surpassed as he unrolled himself slowly, lowered his legs, and pushed on to me, locking us firmly together.
That produced a continuous spasm of pleasure that spread quickly throughout my body as he pulled me in as far as he could. By now his legs were wrapped around my body tightly, holding me firmly in place.
I was all the way inside him now and I had never experienced anything quite so intensely pleasurable in my life.
“Oh, god, unbelievable,” I muttered. “That was just unbelievable, Cameron.”
“And you thought ballet was useless,” he whispered, grinning at me.
Never again, Cameron; never again.
He was smiling at me now and I was totally bewitched by that smile. I just knelt there, buried inside him, wanting nothing more than to bask in that smile and the feel of his legs hugging my body so firmly.
“Go on, Hunter,” he whispered. “This is what you’ve been waiting to do all your life.”
I adjusted my hips slightly until they were completely comfortable, then pulled back slowly and gently. When I sensed I was as far back as I could be without jeopardizing our coupling, I pushed forward, more slowly this time.
Somehow it’s a motion that’s instinctual for men, something that harkens back to time immemorial, one made even more pleasurable because it was happening in a place that was so warm, so tight, and so very inviting with someone I cared about so much; the person who had saved me from myself.
Cameron had closed his eyes by now and seemed to be in some other place entirely. He was whispering something to himself softly, so softly I was unable to make out what he was saying.
Eager to join him wherever he had disappeared to, I began pumping back and forth more rapidly; harder, deeper, more violently. I was breathing rapidly now and deeply as well.
“Don’t stop,” he murmured, “for god’s sake, don’t stop. Give it to me, Hunter.”
That was it, the last thing I heard before it happened. I had been waiting so long to do this I was unable to slow myself down or control it. My body was just too anxious to take possession of his. Within moments I was exploding inside him again, exploding even longer and more powerfully than before it seemed to me.
“Oh, god, that feels so good,” he said.
“Fuck, it’s unbelievable,” I responded. “I can’t believe I just did this.”
“Maybe this will help,” he said, squeezing the muscles in his small ass tightly.
“Oh, ah, uh, that’s so …. so incredible,” I said, collapsing on top of him.
Both of us were breathing deeply and we lay there still coupled together for a long time after that. Cameron said nothing. Like before, he almost seemed to be somewhere else entirely and I wondered if perhaps he was thinking of someone else as well.
If he was, I was fine with that. He had made me happier than I had ever been in my life and I wanted him to experience the same joy as me.
Later, much later, after cuddling together for a long time, I wrapped my arms around him and the two of us fell asleep in his room.
When I woke up the following morning Cameron was still wrapped in my arms. For me it had been one of those rare kinds of sleep where you wake up totally relaxed and refreshed, as if you had slept for days. Cameron was still asleep. Not wanting to disturb him, I just laid there cuddling him.
I remember thinking how young he looked, how cute. He had never seemed to have a care in the world and it showed on his face that morning.
I closed my eyes and tried to recall everything that had happened the previous evening. Just thinking about it caused me to go hard and in precisely the place that would have allowed me to take advantage of his vulnerability at that moment.
He stirred momentarily as it slipped between his cheeks; then relaxed again the moment I pulled back, embarrassed by what had happened.
Leave the poor kid alone, I recall thinking. He seems to be enjoying his rest and he’s already done more for you than anyone could reasonably expect.
As the months had passed, I had come to recognize Cameron was incredibly perceptive and I remember wondering whether he had known I was gay from the very first moment we met. If not, it seemed to me he must have known for a long time and I remember shaking my head.
He could have asked anytime. That’s probably what I would have done if the shoe had been on the other foot. But he had waited until he knew the moment was right and given me the opening to tell him if I was able to summon the courage.
He wouldn’t have pressed me. That was obvious from what he had said. But he gave me the opening and he had chosen exactly the right moment; and now, the morning after, I was grateful to him for asking and happy I had somehow finally found the strength to tell him.
Why had it been so hard? I recall asking myself. What was the big deal after all? Everyone is different and I had never felt any animosity toward those I knew who were gay.
Why had it been so hard for me to tell someone what I had suspected deep down for such a long time?
It seemed to me I had been foolish to wait this long.
What the two of us had done in bed together the previous evening had been the most satisfying moment of my life. I felt fulfilled in a way I had never experienced before.
I wonder what would have happened if I could have summoned the courage to tell Ethan?
Don’t even go there, Hunter, a voice deep within cautioned.
Like the dude says, you can’t go home again.
Looking over at Cameron, I wondered if this might be fate; if Cameron was the person I had been looking for all my life? He was so beautiful, so loving. He was everything anyone could ever want in a best friend, a perfect companion for life.
Forget about it, dude, I said, looking at him.
He loves William. You shouldn’t have done what you did to him last night.
You put him at risk and for what?
To satisfy your own lust, your own hunger; he helped you and looked what you did?
What kind of friend does something like that?
I must have been totally lost in my thoughts by then because the next time I opened my eyes and looked down he was just lying there smiling at me.
When he saw me look down at him, his body seemed to stretch in a million directions all at once. But as much as he squirmed, I held on to him tightly, giving just enough room to move here and there but not enough to escape my grasp.
“Oh, jeez, sorry,” I said; “good morning, Cameron. I guess I was off in my own private world somewhere. I didn’t even see you open your eyes.”
“That’s okay,” he responded. “You seemed kind of wrapped up in whatever you were thinking. I didn’t want to interrupt.”
“Um, well, thanks,” I responded. “And thanks for last night as well. It was just so perfect, Cameron, and I’m just incredibly grateful to you.”
“You’re welcome,” he responded, smiling at me. “It was my pleasure; and I’m not just being polite about that either. You’re a stud in bed, Hunter, an absolute stud.”
I remember being embarrassed when he said it. I mean, I was grateful for the compliment, but me; a stud? I realized he was just trying to make me feel good about myself.
“Um, well, I don’t know about that,” I said. “I guess when you’ve waited for something like that for twenty years, maybe you’re a little too eager and it comes across as being a stud. But thank you for saying that. Coming from you, it means a lot.”
“You’re too much, Hunter,” he responded, grinning at me. “You think everyone is going out of their way to be nice to you and don’t really mean what they say. You should know me better than that by now. I don’t go around handing out random compliments. I try to be honest with people because that’s the way I want them to be with me. So believe me, Hunter; you definitely are a stud in bed.”
“Um, well, thanks,” I said. “But the thing is, I’m sorry, Cameron. I took advantage of you last night and it was wrong. I know how much you love William and, well, I don’t know what to say. I mean, it was the best experience in my life and I’m just so grateful to you for that. But I also feel like a real bastard for putting my own need above yours.”
He stared at me intently. For a moment a shadow covered his face; but as quickly as it happened, it disappeared just as quickly.
“I don’t know,” he said. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe this morning, in retrospect, it was wrong. But last night, while it was happening, I was pretty certain it was right. Not that I’m looking forward to telling William about it. But I think he’ll understand why it happened and I hope he’ll forgive me.”
“You don’t have to tell him, Cameron,” I said. “Why do that? It was my fault, not yours, and I would never tell him or anyone else, never in a million years. Please don’t take a chance of ruining everything between you and William because of something that’s my fault. I know you love him so much. I wish you didn’t, but I know you do.”
“Why would you wish something like that, Hunter?” he asked, and there was a look of genuine curiosity on his face. He was clueless, totally clueless. It was the first time I had ever seen him so clueless and I knew he wasn’t faking it either.
“Because I’m selfish, Cameron,” I responded. “Before you woke up, I was just sitting here thinking how great it would be if you were my boyfriend.”
He looked surprised when I said it.
“The morning after the first time leaves some guys delusional,” he replied, grinning. “You think you love me, but what you’re really in love with right now is my little ass. But that’ll pass soon enough and you’ll come to your senses.”
“You don’t love me, Hunter. You love Ethan. You’ve loved him all your life and you still do; and, yeah, I worry about it because I don’t know for sure whether it will ever happen for you. I want it to. I want it to happen really bad. But I’ve never met Ethan so I can’t really say what’ll happen. He could be straight. You need to recognize that’s a possibility.”
“What I do know is you love Ethan, not me, just like I love William. And that’s why I have to tell him about what happened last night.”
“But don’t worry that pretty little face of yours about it, Hunter,” he added, suddenly scrambling on top of me.
“I could have said no, but I didn’t want to; and not just because I was doing you a favor. I was pretty certain I was doing myself one as well.”
“You little stud,” he added, tickling me.
He had touched me in exactly the place I was most vulnerable and I started squirming around and laughing.
“Stop,” I screamed, trying to escape his grasp.
I mean, being ticklish like that, I was completely at his mercy now and he could have done whatever he wanted and I would have been happy to let him.
But, after giving me a quick peck on my lips, he just rolled off of me.
“Okay, Mr. Stud Muffin,” he said. “So are you going to be a gentleman this morning and take me out for breakfast or do I have to sneak out of here like some skanky prostitute?”
“I owe you a lot more than breakfast,” I responded. “I owe you everything, Cameron.”
“I owe you my life.”